Freedom And Prejudice: 10 Harmful Things Wise Parents Still Let Their Children Do
We can easily come across the adult rules set out to ban children. Are
those stereotypes true? In order to raise an adult child, parents must always try
to find the balance between allowing their children to develop freely with the
rules of life.
Parents
are not always right and imposing an adult's point of view on their children,
asking them to follow their rules can sometimes be counterproductive, causing
stress in life. Bright Side has gathered expert knowledge and
knowledgeable parent experiences about things we shouldn't ban our children.
1. Prohibit children to tear,
dirty clothes
Unfortunately for parents in this situation, the best way for
children to learn about the outside world is to run and explore their
surroundings. Of course, at these times, kids will forget how much their
clothes cost, as well as the brand on the t-shirt labels they made when they
rolled on the grass.
If
you're angry at having to throw away expensive clothes that your kids can't
wear anymore, it's probably better to divide your child's wardrobe into one for
outing and one for important events.
2. Prohibit snacking children
To
be honest: almost every child loves junk food - all salty snacks, greasy donuts
and sweets will leave a sticky mark on their hands, then they will go all over
the house and touch everything around. When parents forbid children to eat
these foods, it becomes a taboo in their minds and they will sneakily eat as
soon as the opportunity arises.
Therefore,
experts recommend that parents sometimes buy snacks for their children to
understand that they can have a packet of potato chips at home without having
to hurry and eat the whole bag. Moreover, children will not think of
hiding a bag of candy to secretly eat.
3. Prohibit children from
spending money on useless things
According to a survey, children
today often spend personal money to hang out with friends, buy or download
apps, buy toys, clothes or shoes, as well as buy food or pay for shipping.
. Many parents think it is a waste to spend money on useless things, so
they often try to limit children from buying unnecessary things by banning and
advising.
However, in practice parents should not do this for the
following reason:
- · First of all, once you give your child money, it becomes their property. And it is up to them to decide what to spend this money on. This is especially important in families where young children are paid for household chores.
- · Second, this spending can be helpful for a child when they spend money on nonsense and then regret it. This way they will learn to control their spending and distinguish between immediate preferences and really important needs and wants.
4. Children are prohibited from
rest and play
Psychologists are really afraid
that children today have become much more worried, tired and depressed than
previous generations. Part of this is in fact many children have to
participate in achievement 'races'. Besides, the school curriculum is
increasingly difficult, the volume of homework is much, the pressure from
teachers, parents, puts children under great pressure, causing psychological
instability.
That is why a modern child
needs nothing to do. If your child has free time, give him / her a little
space, do not push, impose children on the principles set by adults.
That is why a child today truly
aspires to do nothing. If your child's schedule is empty, don't rush to
fill it with new tasks. Sometimes having nothing to do, being a little
lazy is also a happy thing for children.
5. Children are prohibited from
attending school
Sometimes we can even create
free time for children, especially when we realize they are depressed or
stressed. Good academic achievement is not important, it is important that
students are mentally and mentally healthy while having too much schoolwork.
If you find your child needs a
break, give him a chance to slow down and listen to himself: What do you
want? What do you like to do? What are you dreaming
about? Because sometimes it is even difficult for parents to have time and
alertness to find answers to such simple questions in the whirlpool of life.
6. Children are prohibited from
arguing with adults
This kind of ban can become
dangerous for young children. Because it is important for them to know
that not all adults are good and not all of their requirements must be
fulfilled immediately.
For older children, it will be
ethical. The fact is that wisdom and fairness do not always come from the
elders. Sometimes an older person may be mistaken or behave in an impolite
manner. In these situations, it is important to teach children how to
defend their own ideas and know how to limit themselves. Adults need to
teach them to do so without arguing, teasing, or insulting (of course, it would
be better if they could do it themselves).
If you think you have lost
control of your children because they have started arguing you too often, just
remember that debate is a fight that starts on both sides, not just from one
person. And then show your child an example of a more aggressive approach
by turning debate into a compromise negotiation.
7. Children are prohibited from
choosing their own clothes
Many parents have experienced
so much anger that their eyes "twitched" when shopping with their
children. And it's not just because of the price or the endless choices
and controversy, but also the fact that they disagree with what their children
like. Psychologists have given advice that parents need to stay
calm. After all, you are not the one who will wear those acidic jeans or
hoodie.
It is better to let your child choose for the following two
reasons:
- · In this way, a child develops his own personality. Children will work based on their individuality and find their place in society.
- · The second reason is more realistic - your children will wear those clothes instead of storing them deep in the closet without ever touching them. In addition, children will wear them without arguing every morning with grimaces.
8. Children are not allowed to
disobey
Many parents are familiar with
the saying "children do not listen". First of all, this seems to
be of no use but to make parents with constant headaches. But try to
imagine the opposite situation. You have a child who obeys himself and
does everything he is asked to do.
This child will develop into a mature adult
without the opportunity to protect his or her own interests. And trust us,
the bad people around will rejoice in taking advantage of this child's
character.
Of course, raising children who
are disobedient is a difficult task, but this will help them develop into
confident, ready-to-act adults, instead of being bound by prejudices and only
daring. thinking "I can't do that".
9. Children do naive things
Psychologists say children are
tending to grow up too quickly. This is actually not surprising, when children
are in a world where they always hear things like "you are no longer a
child", "what you are doing is not too childish huh ? ” or
"when will you grow up?" from his parents.
Children will not be able to
naturally develop mentally because someone's designations are as easy as clicks
- then they can pretend to be adults, but they are not prepared yet. for the
difficulties that adulthood will face.
If your children still have a
childish personality and their childhood interests, there's no reason to force
them to give up. Let your children develop at their own pace.
10. Prohibit children from
playing games
Some games come from the basic
concept of education and learning, where children need to solve math exercises
to get to the next level.
“Some older children want to
play baseball all day, but I want to play video games. It's sad because my
parents always thought I destroyed my brain because of my love of video
games. So I was only allowed to play games for an hour before
dinner. But it just seems to make me want to play more, ”which is why
Chris Bergman, the chief executive of a major software company, creates game
applications.
He also confessed that he did not prevent the children from
playing games on computers and phones and believed that they maintained a calm
attitude while playing.
Studies have found that video
games can be more useful for children's brain development than watching
TV. All because the game teaches their brains to react and read
information faster. This skill will be useful for children as they grow up
and live in an advanced technology environment that is even more developed than
it is now.
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